The Sleeping Stripper

Sunday, August 30, 2009

So my friends KS, MS, and myself are in Las Vegas. We decided to go to this porn shop in a dirty part of town (the best kind). After MS gets carded (he was 24 at the time) we headed inside. After looking around at the toys and movies we made our way to back of the shop. They had a separate entrance to "live shows". We figured what the hell, we are in Vegas at 2 am, lets have some fun. On the wall when we entered are pictures of girls and room numbers. To the left are circular style rooms with doors all around. To the right are individual doors with numbers above them. Not being regulars, we decided to ask the drunk Mexican gentleman standing in the hall which was best. He said "If you like dildos go to your right. If you don't have $50 go to your left". "Well I like dildos", I said, "but I don't have that much to spend." So off to the left I go. MS and KS both say "50 bucks sounds good." Off to the right they go.

I entered my closet of a room and found a shaded glass window on the wall in front of me with a vending machine style dollar acceptor below it. On the floor there was a coffee can. I ignored my curiosity about the coffee can and put a $10 in the slot. The shade on the window disappeared and on the other side of the glass was a naked chick dancing. As soon as she saw my window shade disappear she walked over and put one leg up on the wall, giving me a OBGYN's view of her crotch. Realizing I'm in a dark room alone, I whip out my dick and start to jerk off. After a few minutes (okay seconds) I was about to blow. I then realized what the coffee can was for and like Ray Allen at the free throw line, swish. The excitement of the moment now fading, I noticed in the room with the stripper, 8 other small windows with dirty little faces pressed up against them. No doubt doing the same thing I just had.

I quickly exited the room and walked back in the shop to see if my friends had the same kind of fun I had. I saw KS first. He was bragging to some creepy looking guy about his experience. He told me he got in the room and found the same shaded window and money collector, but he also had a phone in his room. He picked up the phone and a girl answered and asked him what he wanted to see. He said "I want dildos in every hole." She said ok and told him to insert the $50 and hang up. He did and the window shade disappeared. Sitting before him on a small love seat was a chick with a large collection of dildos. She started putting them in every hole just like he had asked. A few tugs later and he was aiming for the coffee can too. KS and I were now waiting for MS. Happy with our purchases we told each other our stories.

MS then came out with a puzzled look on his face. We asked how it went. He said it was ok, but weird. We asked why. Apparently he didn't pick up the phone first and just inserted his money. The window unshaded to reveal a naked stripper asleep on her love seat. After a few moments he thought this was all that was going to happen. He figured he'd get his moneys worth and started stroking. Half way through the stripper woke up and freaked out that he is jerking off to her sleeping. Apparently she was so into her sleeping state she didn't realize where she was. She called him a pervert and got up from the love seat and went behind a curtain. He zipped up and walked out to us. After laughing at him, KS tells the entire store what happened to MS. Embarrassed and $50 poorer he walked out to the car. Poor MS.

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