Rent Money

Friday, October 16, 2009

So my roommate RL and I were talking about how he hadn't seen his dad since he was four years old. He said his estranged dad had tried to connect with him when he graduated from high school, but he wanted nothing to do with him. He told me how his dad offered to give him all the money he was supposed to have given his mother for child support, but RL turned it down. Starting to get a great idea I asked, "when was the last time you talked to him on the phone?" RL said, "never." I said, "How about we get even with your scumbag father and get our rent paid for?" RL asked what I had in mind. I told him I would call his dad and say I was him and ask for money. I told him to give me a family cheat sheet in case he asked any questions. RL wasn't sure I could pull it off or whether he wanted to be involved with his dad in any way, but he said ok. He wrote down the who, what, when, and wheres of his family and left. He said he didn't want to be there when I called. I imagine it was a really emotional thing for him but I really wanted our rent paid for so I picked up the phone and called RL's dad.

A man picked up on the first ring. I asked for Pete. He said, "this is him." I said, "I feel a little weird about this but it's your son RL." He said, "oh my god, I am so happy to hear from you." The first hurdle was cleared. He asked me how Aunt Linda was doing. I checked my cheat sheet and answered, "she is good, she just moved back to Flagstaff with her boyfriend Chuck." He asked if cousin Mike was still in the military. I told him he was but would be out soon. I was feeling more and more comfortable so I told him how my car had broken down and how I had lost my job. I told him times were really tough and I wasn't sure how I was going to pay my bills that month. Not taking the hint he said, "I'm sorry to hear that son, but times are tough for everyone right now." That was not the answer I was looking for. Not wanting to waste anymore time I started laying on the guilt pretty thick. I said, "After all these years of nothing from you, the best you can say is times are tough for everyone?" "I knew calling you was a bad idea. Everyone told me I shouldn't but I thought you would be there for me this one time." I said. After a long pause and with his voice starting to crack he said, "how much do you need?" Score! I said, "five hundred should help out a lot." He asked for my address and said a check would be in the mail. He said he wanted to keep in touch and did not want this to be the end but the beginning of our relationship. I told him I had his number and would be in touch. I hung up the phone, stoked that rent for that month was going to be paid.

A few days later RL came in with a letter from his dad and said, "whatever he sent will go towards rent." I agreed. He opened the letter and found a check for two thousand dollars. We started jumping up and down. RL said, "I can't believe you pulled this off." Rent was taken care of for four months all thanks to RL's piece of shit dad. I hope he learned his lesson. Actually, I don't care.


plentymorefishoutofwater said...

Haha, a good trick. Like it. And the blog is very readable. Keep up the good work.

Anonymous said...

Phew, I thought you would use all the money on junk.. o:

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