Pizza Pizza

Sunday, April 18, 2010

So when I was in high school my friends and I started hanging out with these two girls who worked at Little Ceasers Pizza. Even though they were only 17, they were each assistant manager for this particular store. Lucky for my friends and I, they were corrupt as hell.

On many occasions we would walk into the store on a busy Friday night when they were working and grab drinks out of the cooler and reach over the counter and take twenty or thirty dollars out of the register. Other customers would look at us in amazement. Sometimes we would just walk in the back and make our own pizza. Anything went.

After months of the registers coming up short and complaints from customers, even the extremely retarded management at this particular Little Ceasers started to get suspicious. They decided to install security cameras throughout the store.

Right around this time JW started dating one of the assistant managers. They were having sex in the store room. They were having sex in the cooler. They were having sex on the make table. If there was a place in that store that could comfortably hold two people they were fucking in it.

After a few weeks of footage from the security cameras, the management called the girls in for a meeting. They sat down in front of a small television and told the girls they had security cameras in the store for a few weeks and were going to review the footage. When they turned the tape on they were pretty surprised to see more than just stealing. There was footage of JW and SK fucking on the counter tops. There was footage of a naked JW chasing SK through the store with a giant pepperoni. There was plenty of stealing as well. Management turned off the tape. They asked if the girls had anything to say. SK said, "Can I get a copy of the tape."

I couldn't have said it better myself.

7 comments:

ASSHOLE BOYFRIEND said...

Brings back memories of my stint at SUBWAY. lite mayo for lube, a cardboard cut-out of "Jared," and putting a 12' inch Subway® Club in all the wrong places.

Twills said...

This is freaking hilarious! What is it with teenagers and fast food restaurants? I remember being slathered in mayo and lord only knows what else back in the day when I used to work at one. Dammit, I have to write about that now.

A Table For One said...

Haha, I'll never look at Pizza Pizza the same again! Sex in the cooler....sounds...icy. Ugh I can't even make a joke right now I'm to appalled haha.

Sarah P said...

Perfect.
Is there anything else to say?

Danny said...

i was told the kids did the same sorta thing in the pizzeria round the corner from me. pizzas including an anchovy topping, sure it was gonna smell fishy, but when i got a hawaiian delivered once and it smelt the same, that's when i began to entertain the idea of rutting happening on or round my order

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LuckyTHlRT33N said...

Remember when we'd just hang and throw the football in front of that place, stylez?I enjoyed the free pizzas JW, stylez,and I used to get, from exploiting the disgruntled customer free pizza list, or even just cold calling other pizza places telling them we'd talked to another manager already about how we were owed a free pizza cuz they messed up our order, and when they questioned us we just got belligerent until they caved in, LOL. I don't think I payed for a pizza any time I hung with stylez...

 
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